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The Warrior Lampoon
Junior Headliners

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CLASS OF 2005 T-SHIRTS: ONLY $10.00!!!

SALES WILL BEGIN IN MID JANUARY

MATCHMAKER FORMS HAVE GONE OUT AND OUR CURRENTLY BEING PROCESSED BY OUR VERY OWN ASC CUPID, JOHNNY GEORGE

 

 

 

Junior News

CHRIS BALDOWSKI BENEFIT CONCERT

Overall rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Comments: The Mighty Space Monkeys are a talented bunch of kids. That Mike Buccarelli is cute too. They can go somewhere with that kind of talent and good-looks. And I know talent when I see it. Just look at me now!

Danza posing for a close up

 

It seems as if Tony Danza has become the Warrior Lampoons self-proclaimed head spokesperson., which has caused much distraught for former representative, Rhymin Simon. Simon misquoted Shakespeare in an overly dramatic fashion, The brightest stars fade the quickest. Id like to thank the Warrior Lampoon for making me cool though. After choking back tears, he solemnly walked back to class.

Tony Danza spontaneously appeared at the Chris Baldowski Benefit Concert uninvited asking, Wheres the ranch dip? Junior sweetheart Kelli Lane politely inquired, Arent you a celebrity? Dont you have some movie to shoot? Danza chuckled shamefully Well I auditioned for Bad Santa but I was rejected. Instead they gave me a low-budget film on TBS, Stealing Christmas. Its the same general plot though.

In search of an open seat, Danza only received the same glacial answer This seat is taken. Instead he stood near the food table with Pete Fu, both embarrassingly stuffing their pockets with pretzels. Trying to ease his way into the young culture, he shouted Yeah this concert is mad fly! Fu looked at him confused.

The concert was a huge success and thanks go out to the bands and for all your support.

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