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The Warrior Lampoon
Teacher's Disses, Hallway Hobos and The Pen Returner

Teacher’s Diss

-         Teacher’s unknowingly diss their students all the time during class. One of them I noticed is the “That answer is right… but I had something else on my mind. ANYONE?” This one is basically a total call out on your intelligence. You honestly thought you had the correct answer and the teacher lets you down easy. I guess it’s better than a certain Spanish 5J teacher who calls out her students everyday going so far to commenting, “I’m considering a change in profession.” On that note, another huge diss from the teacher is when a person whispers to a friend, “She hates me. She never picks on me” and the other person whispers back, “For the next question I’ll raise my hand and see who she likes more.” When the second person gets picked it honestly makes you feel horrible. You whispered your earlier comment about her “hating you” more or less as a joke and the second person basically confirmed the fact that the teacher hates you. One of the final disses I can think of is when teachers write one grade on an essay, and then scribble it out and put a different grade. It’s the worse when you can see your first grade under the light scribbling. The only reason for this to happen is that the teacher probably graded your essay early and then after reading the other essays, realized yours sucked and brought your grade down.

Real Life Example

Ms. Zitomer: Well… that answer isn’t right. But I wouldn’t say its “wrong” (even gestures the quote signs with two fingers)

 

Hallway Hobos

-        When you’re walking to class do you ever notice those hallway hobos? The kids who just linger around the lockers, not even talking to anyone. They’re just standing there, sometimes pretending to look for someone. I actually tried being a hallway hobo once and the life is tough. You get dirty stares.

 

The Pen Returner

When you lend out a pen, you usually never expect the person to give it back. However, when they do, it makes you feel good inside. I love those guys. But some Pen Returners are bastards about it. First they make it seem that they did YOU a favor by returning the pen. The worse is when you notice the bite indentations on the pen cap and call them out for it and they totally deny chewing on it.

 

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